Friday, November 24, 2006

Super-Sized Post Tryptophan Day Recap

Romo Continues Hot Streak, Against Inferior Secondaries

Friday, November 24, 2006

Super-Sized Post Tryptophan Day Recap

Most of you (probably about six) were probably wondering what the hell was going on Tuesday morning when you noticed there was no TMQB to be had with your morning Bialy and cup of coffee; while you pondered the viability of your son’s interest in Event Planning. The TMQB pulled its whistle-stop tour into Las Vegas this week and among some general observations and a doing a little gloating about a 3-team Parley; let’s spend our precious time together talking about football. Normally, when I wake up on Thanksgiving morning around 10, my head is pounding slightly and I’m dreading being on my feet for the next seven hours cooking the bird, stuffing, &c. This time around, I was up by 7, a.m., to run down to the local purveyor of all things betable to lay a Sawbuck down on the Cowboys & Chiefs and then go after the big dawg with a 3-team, 6-gamer. The TMQB is happy with the results, and let’s leave it at that. There’s also something to be said for having placed your bets, starting to season your turkey, and watching football with a beer in your hand before 10 in the morning. So let’s get down to it…
I found myself doing the unthinkable, rooting for the Miami Dolphins on the road in Detroit, with Joey Harrington at the helm. You may remember, this is the same Joey Harrington the Lions traded to the Dolphins in exchange for a bag of Frito-Lays and half a bottle of Peach Vitamin Water. Harrington threw 3 TD passes in his first trip back to the Motor City and actually made it out without being shot. Miami’s defense, the same defense I thought of when I was making my bet, came up huge with 8 sacks, a forced fumble and an interception of John Kitna. Detroit on the other hand, didn’t come up so huge (more like Stuart Little) and it was pretty evident by about the 3rd Quarter, they were more interested in getting back to 8-Mile and crying over a plate of turkey and a slice of pumpkin pie. Although I didn’t hear them, the fans apparently resurrected their old chants of “Fire Millen” and despite going 23 – 68 since Mikey became GM in 2000, Detroit Linebacker, Boss Bailey, said the blame should rest with the team and not Millen. Or maybe, Boss was just trying to get a sniff of playing time after he spent all of Thursday’s game riding the pine. When it was all said and done, Miami had rattled off 27 straight points to win the game and didn’t let Detroit score after their initial 10 of the 1st quarter.
In Thursday’s second game, Tony Romo and the Cowboys stayed home and rode the high of beating the previously undefeated Colts to a drubbing of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. The Cowboys were favored by 11 and I think most people thought maybe the Bucs defense, particularly Ronde Barber would have been able to shut down Romo a little bit. The one thing most people didn’t count on was Romo’s amazing ability to throw a ball 10 yards, let his receivers do the work and then get all the credit. 5 TD passes later, the Cowboys had Iked their way to a 38 – 10 victory over the Bucs; who looked about as clueless as Lance Bass at a Victoria’s Secret Runway Show. I think the game was probably best summed up by the overstatement of the day from Bucs Coach John Gruden who said of Romo’s fluke performance, “I thought it was Aikman out there.” Yes well someone needs to remind Chucky that Troy does the play-by-play these days, after a dangerous cocktail of too much Michael Irvin and repeated whacks to the head cut his career short. Let’s let the bandwagon jumpers have their say though. ESPN is never afraid to toss their hat into the ring, and they would have you believe that after 5 games he is the greatest QB to ever don a Cowboys jersey, to say nothing of guys named Meredith, Staubach, and Morton, as well as the aforementioned Aikman. Their recap of the game makes the assertion that Romo “out-played” Peyton Manning; which by ESPN logic means we should give him the MVP award right now and forget about the rest of the season or what happened when Romo was watching Bledsoe and his legs of stone sink the Cowboys. I think the jury is still out on our Jessica Simpson dating friend with the stupid grin permanently plastered across his face, and still contend that if Nick Harper had been 100% and the Colts had Mike Doss and Bob Sanders in the secondary instead of on IR, it would’ve been a much different game. You want me to hand Tony Romo any kind of credit, make him throw a ball more than 10 yards and put him against a decent secondary. Until then, I’ll just be jealous of the Jessica Simpson thing.
After that nice little rant, which is pretty much verbatim of what I said yesterday, I tuned into the NFL Network to watch the Chiefs and Broncos duke it out in an old AFL match up. Chiefs owner, Lamar Hunt, who brought football to Kansas City from Dallas, was in the hospital and unable to watch the game he petitioned the NFL for, for so long. The Chiefs, whilst in the AFL played a Thanksgiving Day game against the Broncos in the days before “the merger” and it only took the NFL 40 years to add a third game and give the Chiefs their game. The Chiefs and Broncos played, what was by all accounts, a great game and although it wasn’t in the mold of the old AFL shootouts; it kept me watching throughout the game…and it had nothing to do with my having money on the game, I swear. The Chiefs took the added Thanksgiving Game 19 – 10 on 157 rushing yards from Grandmama and stout defensive play from their defensive line, which held Denver to 38 yards on the ground. Jake Plummer, played what looked like his last game for the Denver Broncos and although he played serviceably, and out-passed Trent Green, it probably wasn’t enough to save his job. So next week, Jay Cutler, with his moxie and his paper route will be taking the reigns of the possibly playoff bound Broncos (ooh, that’s alliterative) in an attempt to steer them towards XLI. More likely than not, this is going to blow up in Bizarro Martin Sheen’s face and the Broncos will finish the season at 9 – 7, at best.
Tom Coughlin is apparently unhappy with the comments made by Tiki Barber after the Giants loss last week to Jacksonville. Barber said he felt the Giants had abandoned the running game and called it a slap in the face to him and his offensive line; as well as a sure way to lose more games. You know, I’m going to have to side with the guy who led the League in total yards last year and was pretty much single-handedly responsible for the Giants even sniffing the Playoffs last season, as opposed to the coach everyone seems to love throwing under the bus. No word yet on Coughlin fining Barber, but the Giants might want to hold off on pissing off their best player until after he retires; lest the ghost of Wellington Mara start haunting the coaching staff.

Random Observations:
Warren Sapp claims people tried to poison him on road trips when he was with the Bucs? Warren, buddy, a muzzle isn’t poisonous; we’d just like it if you didn’t talk so much.
Eagles Coach, Andy Reid is staring Jeff Garcia in favor of A.J. Feeley this week in Indianapolis. Obviously you want a 36-year-old QB attempting to scramble around against the super quick Colts defense; makes sense to me…
Raiders running back Lamont Jordan is out for the rest of the season with an MCL tear. Hey Art, might be time to call the NFL and see if you can get your old job back.

Next Week:
The TMQB takes the show on the road and pulls into the Los Angeles Coliseum to watch Notre Dame hopefully get their asses handed to them by the USC Trojans. If I haven’t make it clear before, watching this game is like watching Michael Richards in a gun fight with Jay Leno…it doesn’t really matter who wins, as long as they both pull the trigger at the same time.